When my mom received her diagnosis of pancreatic cancer and started her chemotherapy treatments, in one of our multiple daily calls she said in a weakened voice, “I want a crown to wear to chemo” and within seconds I was on Amazon buying her the biggest, glitziest and most blinged-out crown.
You see… this was strange for my mom. She was a “grunddune” as we called ourselves within our house. My mother, Virginia, affectionately known as Ginger, was a worker bee and was dedicated to serving others. She established the food bank – the soup kitchen in our city which is still providing services today. Ginger was also on the board of the local women’s shelter and, with her guidance, we too were involved. She gave through service time and time again.
My mom would say “There for the Grace of God Go I”, the echo of which is still heard within my head almost daily.
So, for her to request a crown was confusing. It was so unlike her. But then it hit me. She used her energy for good. For the Light. For others, unconditionally and unapologetically. Service to the Light.
My mom saw everyone’s CROWN of goodness and taught me, my sister and our extended family to do the same. She wanted a crown to wear and it was rare for her to ask for anything. At her funeral, we requested everyone who was a recipient of her goodness to perform one act of kindness within her memory. And although it has been eight long years since her passing, I still lean into her light, pure goodness and teachings.
During this time, when collectively we are facing such a traumatic change and healing, I ask us all to recognize and straighten one another’s crowns and hold in our heart a grievance-free view of each other. Hold your light and love high while letting your crown bedazzle us all!
And let’s check on our strong friends NOW! The givers need to learn to ask and receive, just as my mom did. It’s our calling to awaken to our oneness and connectedness. To rid ourselves of the “I go it alone” lonely feeling.
By the way I keep my mom’s crown on an altar I have. The crown is with Mother Mary, Kuan Yin and a bunch of my crystals, along with a plaque my great-grandfather hand made. Somedays, I wear it when I’m vacuuming or need a little pick me up and I feel more balanced and regally close to my mom.
With love,
Kristen
