Navigating the Costs to Conception: 3 Tips for Lesbians on the Fertility Journey

Guest post by Kelly Fenton.
You can contact Kelly at

The fertility journey can be one wild ride. It can feel like you are on a never-ending adventure and you have no idea when you’ll reach your destination (pregnancy). The more you can anticipate the better.

pregnancyWhen my wife Nicole and I started our fertility journey we thought we knew the costs associated with getting pregnant insemination style – purchasing sperm, buying ovulation detection kits, Doctor visits and pregnancy tests (these were all financial factors we had budgeted for). However, we were unaware of some of the other costs that occurred during our journey – fertility testing, shipping and storage fees, lost wages from going into work late for an insemination, the emotional toll of disappointment month after month, and after months of trying, the continued financial expense.

For same-sex couples trying to get pregnant through insemination either at home or in a clinic, the financial component is apparent from the beginning; when pregnancy takes longer than anticipated, those costs can add up, big time! This can create even more stress during an already intense time.

Below are 3 Tips to help you navigate the costs to conception:

  1. Spend some time & money up front making sure that you are healthy and able to conceive. This is both for financial and emotional sanity. Before using hundreds of dollars of sperm trying to get pregnant and months of your time and energy, you’ll want to make sure it will all work. Fertility Testing can provide you with peace of mind and alert you to any barriers to pregnancy.
  1. Know What the Costs Are. Research the standard financial costs associated with trying to get pregnant (this website is a great resource – Knowing what the expenses are for a typical month will help you budget better over time. Also find out what, if anything, your health insurance will cover.There are also non-financial expenses such as your time and energy. It’s important to be aware of where you stand in relationship to those as well. You won’t be able to keep going if you’re physically and emotional wiped out. Taking time off from trying can be valuable in order to recharge your spirit and your wallet.
  1. Create a Game Plan. When you know what you’re up against, it can be easier to navigate the terrain (and also respond if something unexpected comes up). How long do you want to try before taking a break or switching up your method of insemination? What sorts of things will help you to stay grounded and balanced during a time flooded with hormones and high stakes? Where will you get support? Knowing the answers to these questions will prepare you should they arise.

By investing your time, energy and money wisely you’ll hopefully be able to create systems that allow your fertility journey to be as short, smooth and stress free as possible. Stepping into the space of motherhood having conquered this time will make you feel stronger and more prepared to be a great mom. Remember, you’ve got this!

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