Guest Post by Heather Zeni.
My husband and I tried to conceive for six and a half years.
That’s six and a half years of living in, what I call, “The Tornado”.
The anticipation, the calm — then the storm. On repeat..over and over.
We were told multiple times that it was literally impossible to ever conceive a biological child. My husband being deemed sterile and I with a diminished ovarian reserve, the odds were literally against us.
But we believed.
I say that short sentence fully knowing that it bears speculation as to being too simple…too cliche…and, at times – annoying. But that word, the single word “believe” got me through those six and a half years. Sometimes I cursed it. Sometimes I doused myself in it.
5 years into our conception journey I was introduced to a new concept. The idea? Fertility.
To stop thinking, living, breathing “infertility” and to switch the negative into something more positive. Think FERTILITY — believe in fertility.
So I made the switch. I started thinking about being fertile rather than being infertile.
I stopped sharing all my infertility struggles, and began to share the stories of our journey as a whole. The journey — was in fertility. The struggle was in the infertility. I kicked my addiction to the obsession I had with our struggle and celebrated the strength I found in the journey.
My intentions were set.
We would become parents.
We did believe.
We were fertile.
Try it. Try paying attention to how much attention you pay to being ‘infertile’. You’ll probably surprise yourself. I used to mope through my days clinging to my self-pity. I wore my struggle on my sleeve. And while that’s completely understandable and even brave in its own sense — it’s also very self destructing.
Make the switch. (Or at least give it a try. If nothing else it’ll be a refreshing experiment!)
Heather Zeni is a Certified Fertility Massage Specialist and a self-published Author of “The Spare Room”. She uses her own fertility journey as a means to help others find a sense of peace and support during their own fertility struggles.