A friendship of twenty years is one of life’s great gifts. I met Mary through my now ex-husband’s entrepreneur group when he and I were just beginning to date – a long, long time ago!
Mary and I have witnessed each other’s life journey and now as we sit together for a dinner visit on this torrential rainy December night, the familiarity of our togetherness brings a sense of comfort and validation beyond measure.
My favorite practice is to bring something sparkly and special for my friends as a celebration of our friendship. With that in mind, I went to my favorite Tibetan Store for a special little something to celebrate Mary’s birthday.
I’ve been accused of being on the nutty-crunchy side, but my true friends accept me and create an opening to my spiritual practices.
My favorite gift store, Tibetan Mandela http://tibetanmandalacapecod.com/ is in the center of Hyannis, Massachusetts. I love to stop by to purchase tingshas, singing bowels and most importantly my “Calming” incense that I burn in my office space.
My daughter, Grace and I zipped into Tibetan Mandela to buy Mary’s gift, some more incense and to replace my three-year-old “moonstone” earrings. I lost one earring after wearing them almost daily for the past three years. They are particularly meaningful to me because I purchased them in the middle of my divorce.
Buying these earrings in the midst of my marriage ending helped me feel a sense of protection. One of the properties of this precious stone is to keep the wearer on their unique spiritual path. Read below for more about moonstone’s qualities.
After I realized that I lost one of the earrings, and had a moment of tears, I comforted myself with the thought that perhaps someone else needs the healing qualities of the moonstone and they were sent off to that person.
Back to my shopping! Another gift in that loss is that Grace decided she and her brother would purchase a replacement pair of moonstone earrings for me for Christmas while we were visiting “my store”.
The beautiful female Tibetan store owner wasn’t there when we walked in and I said to her partner “Where’s my friend”? He was quiet and peaceful, and grounded within himself with a smile of comfort.
Grace looked for a turquoise stone for Mary. The stone’s quality is spiritual protection and is her birthstone too. I began to tell the store owner how I lost my earring and how much I loved them, wearing them every day.
In his quiet manner, he told me that he was recently at a show with his beautiful goods and accidentally tripping, he spilled a tray of precious stones. It made him so uneasy because of the beauty and the financial investment that might be lost but his son turned to him and said “nothing is permanent.”
He chuckled, realizing his son’s wisdom and that he has a greater understanding of detachment than he knew.
Nothing is permanent and the art of detachment. With his smile and a quick giggle I had an “ah ha” moment.
Nothing is permanent.
I am blessed that my friendship with Mary has been within the flow of our life’s journey and the lesson about loss was shared with me through the very unassuming shop owner. The gift-purchasing excursion was a greater gift for Grace and me.
Then a few days later, I received my weekly Heart Advice from Pema Chodron, See below.
Where in your life do you need to open up to the concept of detachment?
In the throes of a high conflict divorce and the after effects of that, remembering, remembering “nothing is permanent” is the key to moving forward with Grace.
Listen in to the Divorcing Intact monthly tele-coaching call and learn more.
STAY ON THE BRINK
When things fall apart and we’re on the verge of we know not what, the test for each of us is to stay on that brink and not concretize. The spiritual journey is not about heaven and finally getting to a place that’s really swell. In fact, that way of looking at things is what keeps us miserable.
Thinking that we can find some lasting pleasure and avoid pain is what in Buddhism is called samsara, a hopeless cycle that goes round and round endlessly and causes us to suffer greatly.
The very first noble truth of the Buddha points out that suffering is inevitable for human beings as long as we believe that things last, that they don’t disintegrate, that they can be counted on to satisfy our hunger for security. From this point of view, the only time we ever know what’s really going on is when the rug’s been pulled out and we can’t find anywhere to land.
We use these situations either to wake ourselves up or to put ourselves to sleep. Right now—in the very instant of groundlessness—is the seed of taking care of those who need our care and of discovering our goodness. Pema Chodron (http://www.shambhala.com)
As ancient as the moon itself, Moonstone holds the power of mystery. Its secrets are locked beneath the shimmering, translucent veil, and with them, our own hidden truths. Moonstone is said to be a stone of meditation on our own inward journey, taking one deep into the self to retrieve what is missing, the parts of our self that were left behind or forgotten. Moonstone is the bringer of calm, peace and balance. The peace and calm that moonstone generates has a sensual, otherworldly quality to it; it is infused within the translucent quality. To dream of moonstone means travel and good health, but May also symbolize the unfolding of spiritual and psychic development. Moonstone used in meditation is said to unlock the understanding of one’s self. Moonstone also has an enchanting, soft glow of optimism and creative energy. It has been worn as an amulet to bring good emotions to the wearer, while protecting those of a sensitive nature. It can reunite lovers who have quarreled. Moonstone is also considered a good luck stone. Moonstone is a very personal stone. It is a reflection of the person who owns it. It does not add or detract, only shows how it is. This is why the moonstone is said to perceive that which “is”.