The other day, I was knee deep with “doing.” You know “doing” all the necessary things to keep my household humming. I checked off my to do list and realized that, moment-by-moment, I was prioritizing what needed to be done.
This or that, not this, that next, make lunches now, let the dog out next!
I stopped for a second and realized that the underlying pressure that usually resides on my chest wasn’t there.
My body’s unconscious response to the day’s “have to do” list had lessened, changed and shifted from dread to joy. I packed lunches and my children and I did everything we needed to do to get out the door by 7:00 AM and this was all done with a smile on our faces. It was as if I was driving a standard shift car, unconsciously going with the flow.
The intensity behind the to do items wasn’t there. Instead it was replaced with a smile and the wisdom of knowing it will all get done, perhaps not as “perfectly” as I might have done it in my former intensity filled world (judgment), but all will be done, easy peesy lemon squeezy!
The inner wisdom of my heart and a divine flow to the day had taken over me and I started to laugh. Just as I had been unconscious to the holding, clenching and restrictive way of being, I was likewise unconscious to the flow until that moment. Then it was like I had achieved a V-8 moment of realization.
For the past three years, I had put to live in peace on my Goals List. It definitely was not a tangible or accountable goal because it is hard to define peace.
When I wrote the goal “Our home life is peaceful and joyous,” my children and I were in undeniable chaos.
So the ‘ah ha’ moment came all wrapped up and pretty! There it was, the gift from the chaos, heartbreak and sadness of life’s happenings. In order to know definable peace, I needed to walk through chaos and pain to get to the other side. It was like walking over a bridge to the other side of a rough river, looking back, and then exclaiming!: “Oh that’s where I was, but now I’m here.”
It was within that ‘this or that’ moment that I realized the underflow of peace. I understood and knew that all is well, that it will be done in divine time and that family and health are the most important to me.
So how do you transform the hard driven day into a day that resonates with peace and quiet and connects to the peace of knowing?
You need to go through the duality of the chaos and negative energy and witness what it feels like, and then go about your day.
I’m not saying to simply ‘let it go,’ because I used to get seriously bothered when someone would say that to me! “Let it go and relax and then you’ll get pregnant” was not what I wanted to hear. It is not like letting go of a balloon and watching it lift up and away from you. It is not that letting go.
I am referring to a re-learning of a system of being conscious within yourself and your life.
You need to awake and accept without judgment the person you are right now, including the chaos and challenges in your life. You must feel loving kindness towards who you are! Then claim what you want to be. You could start by simply stating out loud:
I am peace.
I am love.
I am powerful.
Ask yourself what you are feeling and then hang out with that feeling… all the while knowing that feelings change along with your life circumstances.
I am peace.
(Originally Published October 1, 2013)